Ninety percent of getting organized is getting motivated

My friend Nancy and I have discovered time management guru Jeffrey J. Mayer. Well actually, Nancy discovered Mayer in a thrift store and shared him with me. Nancy paid twenty-five cents for the book she found and I have already spent twenty-five dollars on gas trying to chase down the rest of his (out of print) books. Of course I could order copies online, but I have to have the books right now (see previous posts for my obsession with books).

After three used book stores and two chains I gave up and resorted to the library, and you should know I am desperate for a book when I use the library, because it doesn't involve spending money. That's not exactly true this time, though. Before I could check the Mayer book out I had to pay a $1 fine I had from 2003. Anyway, we are hooked on Jeffrey.

I should be ashamed of myself for confessing the state of my personal and work life because I teach a get organized class If you don't use it, lose it at the local community college. But the state of my everyday affairs are driving me nuts and I'm not sure when I lost control. Somehow, I fell off the declutter wagon and never felt the fall. I have been carrying a plastic bag full of mail and bills to work and back everyday for weeks thinking I will work on them at lunch, only to carry them back home each night untouched because, well, I didn't have time.

In less than thirty minutes after I read the first two chapters of Mayer's If you haven't got the time to do it right, when will you find the time to do it over I tore through my office and my file cabinets in the workroom like a tornado. In less than two hours I had almost filled a 50 gallon tub for the commercial shredder. The following day I cleaned and deleted over 300 files off of my computer (mostly photos) I had stored for PR that I hadn't touched in months. I love to exaggerate, but I tell you the truth here. I can't tell you how liberating all of this was. I opened my office door on the second day and felt air, there was room to breathe not only in my office, but in my mind.

Here's what Mayer said directly to me in his book. You don't have to keep every single piece of paper and file in case someone asks for or needs it later. It's okay to say "I'm sorry I don't have that," especially when it isn't my job to have it. Whew, what a load off that was!

I am a list maker. I encourage list making. But Mayer has a different approach to using lists to stay focused. He uses a master list and it is ongoing. I made a master list for the office and a master list for my personal life. Suddenly, little projects that have been weighing on me day and night seemed like a breeze to complete. Friday, after reading the chapter on procrastination, I took care of a bit of personal business in 30 minutes that I had put off for three months.

But you know something? Mayer didn't say all that much that I didn't already know, really. I just needed motivated and his book did the trick. I have books by Julie Morganstein, The Slob Sisters, I have used all of these as helps when I teach decluttering. One thing I emphasize in my class is you can know all the tricks of the trade to get organized but if you don't get motivated and stay that way your life and mind are always going to be cluttered.

Well, for whatever reason I'm back on track now. I’m motivated and I’m getting organized again.

Thanks Jeffrey J. Mayer . . . and move over!

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Coming full circle

I always wanted to be a writer. My mother kept some of my essays from elementary school and even then I had, shall we say, a creative imagination. If the teachers' comments meant anything, I also had a knack for writing. My spelling was gawd awful and my grammar wasn't much better, but even when I was nine years old I could tell a story.

In the mid 70s I began writing a country music column for our small hometown newspaper. Back then, Branson was just a blip on the map and Springfield housed some pretty good size country music theaters. I wrote my column without pay, but it got us into a lot of country music shows free.

Thanks to the local DJs, I had the privilege of interviewing a few semi-famous entertainers, Boxcar Willie when he was part of Hee Haw, Carl and Pearl Butler from the Grand Ole Opry, when they were performing at the Shrine Mosque, and many of the Ozark Country Jubilee crew. That was a long time ago. My mother also kept those columns (which I fully appreciate now) and when I read Lee's Country Likin's I cringe at how corny they were. Dal Mason, editor/publisher of our paper, opened the door for me and I will never forget his kindness and mentoring.

In 1976 I sold my first piece to the Springfield News-Leader (a Gannett publication) and I thought I had arrived. Twenty dollars . . . and the story TV and the two year old ran on the inside cover of their weekly TV magazine. One of the paper's artists complimented my story with a great cartoon. I thought I had died and gone to heaven, I was so proud.

Shortly after that I had about a twenty-year case of writer's block and I just shut down completely. Then in the early 90s I began writing PR releases in my job, and I met Laura Scott, editor and owner of Springfield's Today's Woman. Laura and I hit it off right from the start. I did a couple of features for her and then the gal that had been writing a column for TW went to work for the News-Leader and Laura allowed me to fill that slot with a new column Fiftysomething (back then I was fiftysomething). Laura and TW gave me a great outlet for my writing. I joined the Springfield Writer's Guild (past president) and then the Missouri Writers' Guild and through the guilds I was fortunate to receive many awards for my columns.

Several years later Laura sold the magazine to KGBX and stayed on as managing editor. Then Clear Channel Communications bought KGBX. CCC was not in the magazine business, although they kept the mag for a couple of years before letting it go. So, after nine years of writing a monthly column, I was out of a writing job, and back to writing PR for my day job.

In case you are wondering where the coming full circle comes in, here's the kicker.

Dal Mason passed away many years ago and his paper, the oldest in Greene County, saw a couple of owners come and go. In April of this year Laura Scott bought the Commonwealth and the Cross Country Times (a neighboring city's weekly). To say it is a small world would be an understatement, but it didn't take long for Laura and I to connect again, and I am back with a monthly column Leezy's Slice of Life in both papers.

Basically, I am right back where I started over thirty years ago (hopefully not as corny). But, it's nice to be here, and it's great to be doing a column again.

This post was mostly to say thank you to Laura. I'm looking forward to another nine years (or maybe longer), and I hope Laura is too.

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What is a liberal anyway?

My son over at accordingtothisjim has a great link on his today's (Friday, June 16) post.

The link is to a survey that will tell you where you are on the political map. Of course we are not surprised that I came out a Liberal, however, I scored a little closer to the centrist than I would have guessed.

This is a great website with simple definitions of political preferences.

I loved the following quote under Defining Liberalism on theadvocates.org. This so describes the way I think, feel and believe. From John Kennedy:

Liberalism is not so much a party creed or set of fixed platform promises as it is an attitude of mind and heart, a faith in man's ability through the experiences of his reason and judgment to increase for himself and his fellow men the amount of justice and freedom and brotherhood which all human life deserves. -- Sen. John F. Kennedy, September 14, 1960

Of course, I am still pondering what it means that I didn't score further left than I did. And my conservative son came out a Libertarian according to the survey.

Maybe we are not as extreme opposite as we think politically? Nah . . . not a chance.
:]

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May-December marriage good investment

I was cleaning out the files on my office computer today and came across one of my old columns from when I wrote for our local Today's Woman Magazine. This is from about ten years ago. I am now 62 and my husband is 77, I was in my early 50s and he hadn't been retired all that long when it was published. Thought I would share it as a post.

According to the National Center for Health Statistics, the greater the age split between husband and wife, the longer the relationship lasts. Several years ago the center conducted a 28 state study of 134,000 couples and found there was a significant drop in the divorce rate when husbands were at least 10 or more years older than their wives.

They’re called May-December marriages. I consider myself an expert on the subject since my husband and I just celebrated our twenty-fourth wedding anniversary and he is almost 15 years my senior. Just like in the movies, it’s true that the older man is a catch for any girl. However, if you have not been exposed to a mature man, it takes a little getting used to.


At 27 years of age I had never had a man assist me down the stairs, open a car door for me or order my dinner at a swanky restaurant. Actually, the closest I had come to fine dining was eating inside at McDonald’s instead of going through the drive-thru window.

The first time my husband took my arm to help me down the stairs, I jerked away and said “For crying out loud-I can walk down the steps by myself!” There was a mixed expression on his face, one that was a toss up as to whether to be hurt, or to push me the rest of the way down the stairs.

Remembering to sit still until he walked around and opened the car door for me was a real challenge. I was always in a hurry. I would forget, open my car door and bounce out of the car before he would have time to get around to my side. After awhile I got pretty good at jumping back in the car and closing the door before he caught me. He’d open my car door and I’d be panting from the jump back in. When he asked why I was breathing so hard I would say “You know you take my breath away.” Pretty slick, huh?

At a candlelit table at Trader Vic’s in Dallas, Texas, he ordered hors d’oeuvre, an entree, and dessert. My first experience at fine dining, and what did I know about the courses of a meal. The hors d’oeuvre came on a huge plate, enough food for 40 people, and I thought it was our dinner. I cleaned the platter and was stuffed when the waiter asked if we were ready for our main course. It took two good size men to carry the main course to the table. I said in as low of whisper as possible “I thought what we just ate was our dinner. What’s all of this?”
“That was just the appetizers,” he answered with a puzzled look on his face.
It took three doggy bags to hold my main course, but I sure wasn’t going to waste all that food and money.

Bringing an older man home to meet the folks is somewhat of an experience in itself. My mother had grave doubts about our relationship 24 years ago. Today, she and my husband are a team. Especially when it comes to dealing with me.

Do opposites attract? You bet. He likes Hank Williams, I love the Beatle’s, he’s a morning person, I don’t even start thinking until 8:00 at night, I love people, he would rather be alone. He could sleep through a tornado, I hardly ever sleep. So what has kept us together for 24 years?

Well, just like the statistics said, I can honestly attribute our age difference to the success of our marriage. My husband doesn’t feel threatened, is never restless in our marriage because he sowed his wild oats years before he met me, he is forever encouraging, and most of all treats me with respect. I think most of these things come from a more mature man.

My advice to women of any age who are looking for a mate, start looking for someone about 10 years or more your senior, especially if it is your second time around.

What happens when you’re 53 and he’s 67? It’s his turn to stand in the drive-way and kiss you good-bye each morning, and have the home fires burning when you return at night. Ladies. . .it doesn’t get much better than this.

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Want to get to know your grandkids? Visit MySpace.com

A few Sundays ago while checking out my grandson Aaron's blog I found his post about myspace.com. I have to admit I freaked out when I first saw the post and thought ohmygosh I can't believe this kid is allowed to use MySpace. A lot of bad hype about MySpace, enough to scare someone my age for sure, but after reading Aaron's post I decided to check his MySpace out.


Although I haven't yet gathered enough nerve to actually sign up, I have had a field day (at what I can access without signing up) reading about three of my grandkids and one grandkid-in-law to be) all of whom have the coolest MySpaces with terrific photos and music and the whole nine yards. I now know what they like to read and do, what kind of music and movies they like and who some of their friends are. Their spaces are so creative!

My oldest son ("the" dad of these kids) told me he logs on to MySpace on a regular basis just to check and make sure everything is kosher, which is the point Aaron made on his blog about parents monitoring the site.

I have to be honest, it is still a little scary for me to grasp all this, because everything I learned about the kids, I know anyone can learn about them, but as Aaron pointed out you can find evil anywhere you go on the Internet these days (my words not his).

It was just a lot of fun to read through the kids' MySpace spaces and get to know them better. I really loved all the photos of the kids and their friends.

So, if you are a grandparent and your grandkids are on MySpace and you haven't visited their space, I encourage you do so. You will learn some pretty cool stuff.

Just a sidebar here. I also learned why some of the kids spell the way they do. I actually thought Aaron had a problem with spelling when I read his blog on blogger but after visiting MySpace I know that is their lingo (for lack of a better word) like some people use for IMs. That made me feel a lot better, too!!! :]

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Missing the ocean and Daddy

I was born and raised in the East Bay Area of California. I grew up by the Pacific Ocean where sand and seagulls were an everyday sight. I've been fortunate to have traveled the United States and visited some beautiful country within our borders, but there is nothing that beats an ocean view, the sound, the smell, it's just something that you can't explain unless you have experienced it personally. My husband who is an old navy man rolls his eyes every time I say I miss the ocean desperately, but I do miss it and I dream about the ocean a lot.

I hear the California beaches are not what they used to be and that was clean, still uninhibited in some places, where you could actually find a cove somewhere and just sit and watch the waves.

When I was ten or eleven my dad bought a surplus life boat and turned it into a homemade inboard, right in our drive-way. It took Daddy about a year to complete the project. The neighbors had a field day teasing my dad, but the day we pulled that sucker out of the drive-way they were all standing there supportive and watching like it was the launch of the Queen Mary. I remember how excited I was as we headed for the water.

After my dad had proved to my mother that the boat would indeed float, she allowed me to board and waited at the launch while my dad and I took off far out into the bay. We made it almost to under the Bay Bridge with other larger boats passing and waving to us (probably laughing at us because this boat was a sight). As big as the boat was in our drive-way it was a small craft compared to the boat and ship traffic coming in and out of the estuary and the swells were getting stronger so we had to turn back before actually passing under the bridge.

Of course that was over fifty years ago, no regulations to stop us from such an adventure. It wouldn't be possible today.

My dad had a massive stroke several years ago. He has been in a health care facility since the stroke and although he has come a long way in communicating and understanding some things, he never regained his speech.

I bring this up now because with Father's Day fast approaching I wish I could talk to my dad about that boat trip and tell him how much fun it was and how it still stays with me. I'd like to thank him for the long Sunday drives across the San Mateo Bridge to Half Moon Bay (long before it became a niche for tourist) for a nineteen cent hamburger and a walk on the beach where I would hunt for shells as my folks watched me from the car. I am so thankful that I have such good memories of those times, because I miss the ocean and I miss my dad.

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A book is a window to the world Part 4

Part 4

What's my fixation with journalists? I dunno. I am married to a man that loathes the media . . . media as in reporters. But I have a great admiration for those reporters (mostly from the old school who are fading fast) that have brought us the world, good, bad, or otherwise and especially for those who broke new ground like Jessica Savitch, NBC's first woman anchor.

Here's my short list of favorites, bios, autobios, and miscellaneous. Not in any order (except for the first book listed):

Bios, Etc.
A Good Life, Ben Bradlee (my favorite, I'm partial to the Washington Post anyway)
Golden Girl, Alanna Nash
Reporting Live, Leslie Stahl
And So It Goes, Linda Ellerbee
The Camera Never Blinks Twice, Dan Rather
Exposing Myself, Geraldo Rivera
Off Camera, Ted Koppel
A Reporter's Life, Walter Cronkite (a couple of years ago I went to "A Conversation with Walter Cronkite" when he visited the performing arts center nearby. In his 80s then, he still was as sharp as a tack and the house was packed)
Nothing But The Good Times, Molly Ivins (my favorite political columnist)
The No Spin Zone, Bill O'Reilly (I know, I lost my mind for a minute when I bought this book. I guess I got caught up in the spin)

Odds and Ends
I love columnists and their books. My shelves are sprinkled with:
Erma Bombeck
Art Buchwald
Andy Rooney
Dave Berry

Just to finish up this series of posts I couldn't leave out my love for plain old bios of any kind. I have many books on the Kennedy's, the Onassis family, the Royals, Elvis, and John Lennon, Best: Lennon Revealed, Larry Kane and Loving John: The Untold Story, May Pang

I have enjoyed working on this blog about what I like to read. While scanning my bookcases I have dusted a few books off and had a good time just going through some that I haven't read for years. One night I decided to count the books (I know I need a life!) just to see how many there were . . . 638. That's a lot of dust collecting. I also decided to sort some of the older paperbacks out and pass them along to the local nursing home.

I'm currently reading Blink, by Malcomb Gladwell. I'll let you know more about it later.

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A book is a window to the world Part 3

Part 3

Along with having a Borders and Barnes and Noble close by we are fortunate to have several used bookstores in the area. I'm not too sure how good that is for my pocketbook, but my friend Nancy and I love to spend time browsing in the used bookstores. I've come up with some pretty good books by accident. And I don't want to forget the good old dollar stores because they are a great place to find out of print books.

I love to read about other cultures and ethnic groups. Amy Tan is one of my favorite authors. I was introduced to her writing in an Ethnics and Minority sociology class I took several years ago. The instructor required us to watch the Joy Luck Club, and I read the book shortly thereafter. I was hooked. Since that time she has written many books. Best: The Bonesetter's Daughter.

Before I go on to a list I want to mention Jimmy Buffett, of all people. I love his writing style and his characters. I have all his books. Best: A Pirate Looks at Fifty. Island hopping with Buffett when I was in my fifties through his book was great.

Well here we go . . . odds and ends, fiction, non-fiction and some never heard ofs and again not in any order:

More Odds and Ends
Jimmy Breslin's The Sweet Short Dream of Eduardo Gutierrez. Now would be a good time to read this book with the immigration situation as it is.
Dead Opposite, Geoffrey Douglas
Until Death Do Us Part, Ingrid Betancourt
The Ashes of Waco, Dick J. Reaves
Above the Clouds: A Reunion of Father and Son, Jonathan Bach (this is the son of Richard Bach who wrote Jonathan Livingston Seagull the 70s book that everyone had to read.
Calm at Sunset, Calm at Dawn, Paul Walkins
Shadow Song, Terry Kay
The Beach Club, Erin Hilderbrand
Beach Combing in Miramar, Richard Bode
All of Robert James Waller's books, read them all, have them all.
Bridges of Madison County, Old Songs in a New Cafe, Border Music, Best: Slow Waltz in Cedar Bend
Are You Somebody? The Accidental Memoir of a Dublin Woman, Nuala O'Faolain
Snow Falling on Cedars, David Guterson (the movie was a disappointment after the book)
Most of James Patterson's books, especially the Alex Cross series, but Patterson's Sam's Letters to Jennifer was a great read.
I have read and have most all of John Grisham's earlier books, but nothing recent. After he switched genres to write A Painted House I discovered Patterson and never went back to Grisham.
As far as romance authors go Jayne Ann Krentz is at the top of my list. I loved her Eclipse Bay trilogy.
Noah benShea's Jacob's Journey and Jacob the Baker

Enough for now. Still to come the journalists and media reads.

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Illegal voting/balloting 101

Right Wing readers check out the June 3 post on accordingtothisjim

Left Wingers want equal time? Check out Fred.net

If there is a liberal out there that hasn't visited Fred.net have fun.

Here's what I think. This is cynical, to say the least. Regardless of illegal votes or rigged machines we probably never have had an honest election and we probably never will.

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A book is a window to the world Part 2

Part 2

I am having a terrible time trying to limit the books I want to list. Not that anyone cares, but I don't want to leave out any really good reads (in my opinion that is).

I'll cut right to the chase and go with my favorite political books, most are bios auto or otherwise. I thought about how to sort these so here's what I decided on . . . Pro Clinton/Anti Bush. Please note that not all my Clinton books are positive in Clinton's favor, but hey, most are, because I don't like to read anything not true about him. :]

Pro Clinton
My Life, Bill Clinton
Living History, Hillary Rodham Clinton
Bill Clinton An American Journey, Nigel Hamilton
The Clinton Wars, Sidney Blumenthal
Partners in Power, Roger Morris
The Natural, Joe Klein (I think this was written objectively)
A Vast Conspiracy, Jeffrey Toobin (I don't care for Toobin on the talk shows but he writes a good book)
Stickin' The Case for Loyalty, James Carville
Boy Clinton The Political Biography, R. Emmett Tyrrell, Jr.
The Agenda Inside the Clinton Whitehouse, Bob Woodward (I have read and own all Woodward's books, I can't say that he was very objective in this one)
First in His Class, David Maraniss (this was one of the first Clinton Books I read back in the mid 90s)
All Too Human, George Stephanopoulos (I loved this book! George was devoted to Bill Clinton until he just couldn't take anymore or the others ousted him whichever way you want to look at it. He was a great advisor and friend and I believe responsible for Clinton's earlier successes. A very candid look at the Clinton/Stephanopoulos relationship.)

Anti Bush
Bushwacked, Molly Ivins and Lou Dubose (love Molly Ivins, she is my favorite columnist)
Bushworld, Maureen Dowd
The Family: The Real Story of the Bush Dynasty, Kitty Kelley
The Bush Betrayal, James Bovard (this was on sale at Barnes and Noble. I haven't finished it yet)
Plan of Attack, Bob Woodward (good)

Odds and Ends
Diane Feinstein, Never Let Them See You Cry, Jerry Roberts
Friends in High Places, Web Hubbell (loved this one!)
Blinded By The Right: A Conscience of an Ex-Conservative, David Brock (interesting stuff on the American Spectator and other conservative powers to be)
Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot and Other Observations, Al Franken

There are so many more. I know a conservative reader can match this list with just the opposite in favor of Bush and the right. And that is why we cherish our freedom so much, because we are all entitled to our own political views.

I am sorry to say, and you are probably sorry to hear, that there will be a Part 3 and maybe Part 4 in this (what I now can call a) series on favorite books and authors. I haven't even started on the journalists yet.

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